i am terrified to love for the first time

it's the things that you don't see coming that

hit you the hardest & keep you down the longest.

I've been hurt too many times, stressed out enough, confused at times,

& sometimes I just don't know what to do.

But what bothers me the most is I can't seem to let go.

if you want something you've never had,

you have to do something you've never done.

Sometimes you meet someone

& before you know their name,

before you know where they're from,

you know that sometime in the future,

this person is going to mean something to you.

God doesn't give you the people you want, He gives you the people you need.

To help you, to hurt you, to leave you, to love you,

and to make you into the person you were meant to be.

& if you really need him, fate won't let you lose him.

fate will bring him back, it may not be soon, but he'll come back.

"I'm scared as hell to want you, but here I am,

wanting you anyway.

And fear means I have something to lose, right?

And I don't want to lose you." -Grey's Anatomy

I don't care how far away you are from me,

or how long it's been since we've talked.

I don't care how mad I got at you,

or how mad you've been at me.

You're still what matters most to me,

& I'm never going to give that up.

Be with someone who knows what they have when they have you.

when you got nothing, you got nothing to lose.

when someone from your past returns, it just means he

has never gotten over you when he left.

it means you were the one that always crossed

his mind when he was with her.

it means he still believes in both of you.

But when you take him back,

you realize you feel the same way.

You can't love anyone that way more than once in your lifetime.

Funny how time changes, but feelings don't.

It's probably the wrong time to tell you. But, well, maybe it's the perfect time.

I realize how incredibly confusing things are between us right now.

I can't even explain our relationship.

You probably cant either.

But I just want you to know that if you ever need me,

I'll always be here for you.

All you have to do is ask.